This paper attempts to fill the gap by performing two . In the socio-cognitive field, Mosquera et al. Further, while mens affective response is more frequently of pride and anger, women live the offense in more ego-focused ways, feeling more sadness, shame, and bitterness an emotion implying longlasting rumination. In other words, being offended is an emotional response because our feelings or sensibilities have been hurt. All negative emotions have the function to alert the subject that an important goal is at risk of being thwarted, and to induce immediate reactions aimed at a repair. In my personal life, I have found that I am more easily offended when my patience is wearing thin. This is why insult is a prototypical cause of offense: criticism, accusation, silence, omission, carelessness are more seriously offensive to the extent to which the negative evaluation explicitly understood or simply inferred is read as permanent and unamendable. The first Bible verse about being offended comes from Proverbs 17:14, which states, "Starting a quarrel is like opening a floodgate, so stop before a dispute breaks out.". Age and gender differences in self-esteem-A cross-cultural window. As a library, NLM provides access to scientific literature. This presupposes a willingness to forgive as a result of a long-term reconciliation path, for example where the transgressor admits ones responsibilities. For example, if she acknowledges that her body as a stable source is repeatedly subject to negative evaluation (see below, type of evaluation emotion) she may anticipate the fear that this evaluative process will accompany her for the course of her life, thus becoming an emotion associated not only with the image of herself (as in the case of shame or guilt), but even to survival goals. Actually, some circularity affects these studies, since self-esteem is defined as what is affected by offenses. One can move on by putting the situation behind without carrying resentment toward the one who offended. They are functionally linked to human adaptation (Frijda, 1986; Scherer, 2009), monitoring the achievement or thwarting of goals like survival and wellbeing, acquisition of knowledge, acquisition, and maintenance of resources, but also the goals of equity, attachment and affiliation, image, and self-image (Poggi, 2008). Being hurt by someone, particularly someone you love and trust, can cause anger, sadness and confusion. Being offended is often identified as grief or sorrow - something one may consider socially, morally, or spiritually legitimate. To forgive is to strive to offer goodness. A problem in these studies is that they mainly investigate the emotional responses triggered by explicit offenses, with particular attention to verbal insults, while neglecting offenses that are less direct, less explicit, and associated to personal rather than public factors. Karen R. Koenig, MEd, LCSW Mediational regression analyses of gender and self-esteem on shame associated to feeling offended. Yet, a previous high self-esteem, seen as an antecedent of the offense, works as a protection factor to support people from aggressive communicative contexts, a coping potential against negative emotional reactions to feeling offended. Therefore, the first aim of our work is to provide a more comprehensive definition of feeling offended considering all possible types of offenses, both public and personal, both explicit and implicit: actions, communicative acts, and inferred mental states. When gender analysis is included, interesting differences emerge. Before IP is responsible for topic ideation, introduction and theoretical part, and qualitative data analysis. Frontiers | Feeling Offended: A Blow to Our Image and Our Social The real examples of our participants provide the mental ingredients of the offense its sufficient conditions as drawn from positive cases. Further research questions concern the causes, conditions, social and cognitive mediators of the feeling of offense, the connected emotions, and the relationships between the offender and the offended person; finally, our hypothesis is that the tendency to feeling offended is increased by lower self-esteem. If you allow negative feelings to crowd out positive feelings, you might find yourself swallowed up by bitterness or a sense of injustice. Types of goals and types of emotions, in, Types of pride and their expression, in, Direct and indirect verbal and bodily insults and other forms of aggressive communication, in. How to Keep From Being So Easily Offended (with Pictures) - wikiHow Furthemore, we will explore the potential relation between self-esteem and associated emotions, by also assessing gender differences in feeling offended. Does high self-esteem cause better performance, interpersonal success, happiness, or healthier lifestyles?. Effects of feeling offended. . Miller A. J., Worthington E. L., Jr., McDaniel M. A. (1996) emphasize that, the higher the honor concern and the significance of the honorable person, the strongest the emotional response to insults. The following are Bible verses about being offended. It is caused by either a non-communicative or a communicative act by B that results into an aggression to As image, since it explicitly points at or implicitly entails a negative property of A: a property worth a negative evaluation of A by B with respect to an evaluation criterion relevant for the image which A wants to project, and shared with B. The most frequent (see Table Table22) are communicative acts (60%), then behaviors (24%), and third the others implied mental states (16%). Or to the category to which A wants others to believe he belongs to. We feel totally inconsequential when we are considered or explicitly accused to be useless, but also when people ignore us, or they omit those simple acts that credit us with dignity and deem us as worth respect. Another very offensive mental state, generally implied by an omission, is the others carelessness: That the other disregards her own promise means that you are not important for her, she does not care you and your feelings: something highly upsetting. In this case the Target prefers to refrain from her possible previous dependence on the Offender, and to give up any relationship with him. Such analysis can be linked to well-known studies stating how women have a lower self-esteem than men (Baumeister et al., 2003), so we could expect persons with low-self-esteem to live offenses with more negative low arousal emotions (sadness and bitterness), internal attributions, and rumination (sense of guilt and rancor) than people with high self-esteem. Both internal attribution (2,32 vs. 1,64; ANOVA: F(1,131) = 4,147; p < 0.000) and external attribution to an event (something happened) (3,66 vs. 3,15; F(1,131) = 2,813; p < 0.006) are higher in case of low self-esteem; when people give a negative global evaluation of the self (Crocker et al., 1993), even when receiving offense they more likely attribute it to themselves or have a more fatalistic attribution, somehow considering the possibility they contributed to that failure/offense. Inclusion in an NLM database does not imply endorsement of, or agreement with, Borderline personality disorder (BPD): Causes, symptoms, and treatment snowake." 2 There, however, being offended tends to be characterized, I will argue, mistakenly, as a kind of emotional upset, borne of over-sensitivity or emotional fragility, or as a retreat into victimhood.3 In this article, I offer an analysis of what it is to take offense and what disengaging from the situation. We feel positive emotions for the achievement and negative ones for the thwarting of these goals; hence, emotions can be clustered according to the type of goal they monitor. Impact of Being an HSP . Values denote standardized beta weights. (2002) study, a gender difference holds in that women, probably due to their higher investment in affective relations (Burr, 2002), tend to feel offended more in family or friend contexts. Participants with high self-esteem express lower levels of negative low arousal emotions when feeling offended: lower sadness, shame, bitterness, rancor, and sense of guilt (ANOVA significant p < 0.05; Table Table1111); differently, people with low self-esteem feel higher levels of negative low arousal emotions, but also fear, showing that their negative global evaluation leads them to experience lack of internal resources to face the received offense (Table Table1111). Looking for the ingredients that, all in all, are contained (mentioned or alluded to) in participants definitions, in their words the feeling of offense appears as a negative emotion felt by A, often close to or embedding humiliation, anger, bitterness, sadness, rancor, the feeling of being misunderstood, impotence, and annoyance. An interesting result is the positive correlation between guilt and positive evaluation of the offender: when one attributes responsibility to oneself, the image of the other is preserved (Table Table88). FOIA Two emotions instead which do not favor forgiveness and worsen the others image are anger (: -352; : -360) and rancor (:-287; : 362). A spirit of offense is a negative spiritual force that can take hold in a person's heart and mind, causing them to feel easily offended, defensive, and angry. To go more into the emotional experience of feeling offended, participants were asked to report one case in which they felt so, the specific reasons why they did, if they believed the other intended to offend, their relationship with the other before and after the offense, and what other emotions they connected to the feeling of offense. Based on a content analysis of participants answers, within a socio-cognitive model of emotions that argues for an adaptive function of each of them, the study has singled out the mental ingredients of feeling offended, its necessary and aggravating conditions, the causes of offense, and resulting offensive evaluations. But even more offensive it is targeting the functional properties of a persons physical arrangement: the stygma of handicap makes the person feel humiliated, and when mentioned or alluded to it is offensive, even, surprisingly, when the intention of B is not to offend but, for instance, rather to help (pity is humiliating). From this point of view, the discrediting evaluations mentioned by our participants as offensive, in partial analogy with previous works on the discrediting acts in political communication (Poggi et al., 2015) can be classified as in Figure Figure22 a physical (aesthetic or functional) inadequacy, plus inadequacy with respect to the criteria of competence (cognitive skill), dominance (power and decisional effectiveness), and benevolence (a moral criterion). Disgust is a negative emotion that comes from disapproving of something or being offended . 5. Since defining an emotion implies finding out the necessary conditions for a person to feel that emotion, we summarize the above analysis in a set of conditions, among which in a Searle-like manner we can distinguish (a) preparatory conditions, (b) essential conditions, and (c) aggravating conditions. Being attributed this negative property is seen as a true wound to As image [the root feri- of verb ferire, adjective ferito, and noun ferita (wound, wounded) occurs as much as 41 times]. Cause (actions, communicative acts, inferred mental states). Evaluations about world conditions, adequacy of actions, respective importance of goals are necessary in both deciding which goals to pursue and making plans to achieve them. (At work when I was not acknowledged the merits of a task performed). Feeling offended is an emotional state caused by a communicated (direct) or inferred (indirect) negative evaluation, conveyed by (1) an action, (2) a communicative act, or (3) the other's inferred mental state. Concerning DOMINANCE, the others carelessness is offensive since it tells they consider us irrelevant. The role of honour concerns in emotional reactions to offences. You might express these feelings by smiling, laughing, or indulging yourself. However, no adequate theory of offense has been developed in the literature, and it remains unclear what questions such a theory should answer. Some participants generally do not attribute a high offensive potential to some kinds of criticism, or they imply that the ease of feeling offended depends on peoples personal sensitivity to others judgment, i.e., As particular touchiness; others even consider their not being hypersensitive to others comments as a matter of moral superiority, often helped by their skills of humor and irony, No dependence of As self-esteem from others esteem.
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